The Skink - Australia's Weekly Sports News Review

A. We care more about liver fluke in Albanian poodles. Now, importantly, Anna's shorts: surely they can be shorter?

Issue of The Week

Q. The Queen Mother turns 100. Care?

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Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six. (N64) Lead an elite group of multinationals against the forces of terrorism.

ACAPULCO, Mexico, July 31 (Reuters) - A giant swordfish hooked off the Mexican coast jumped into the fisherman's boat and stabbed the man through his abdomen, a hospital spokesman said on Monday.

Beautiful Mexico…

Boomers embrace shuffle

Canberra, Saturday: Finally, Boomers coach Barry Barnes is a happy man and is over the smarting from five losses to Russia last month.

Basketball gets a rare guernsey...

RIO DE JANEIRO, July 28 (Reuters) - A Brazilian thief could not have picked a worse day to try and rob passengers on a Rio de Janeiro bus. After snatching more than $800, Jose Roberto Rocha jumped off the bus - right in front of 410 police gathered in a square for an official ceremony with the Rio governor, police said on Friday.

Beautiful Brazil...

TEHRAN, July 31 (Reuters) - The arrest of a shopkeeper accused by ajudge of flirting with his wife has triggered riots in the Iranian town of Qir, officials and media said on Monday.

Beautiful Iran...

Women's basketball league to undergo rule changes

Sydney, Tuesday: The Women's National Basketball League is set for an overhaul with a variety of rule changes being put in place for next season.

Feminists angered…

Gilchrist gets the nod

Sydney, Friday: Wicketkeeper Adam Gilchrist will take over the vice-captaincy of the Australian cricket team from Shane Warne after the Australian Cricket Board overruled the recommendation of its selectors.

Warne could not be contacted for comment as he was photographing cigarettes while having phone sex with a teenage Kiwi bookmaker named Donna.

Hands up who hates basketball. Traditionally, the Boomers struggle to gain a foothold in the Australian sporting psyche, but come September their battle with the US 'Dream Team' should capture the nation's undivided attention. People will then return to not giving a fuck.

Though lacking the larrikanism of a Warne or a Lillee or a Lenny Pascoe, Australia's new VC Adam Gilchrist certainly is a straight-arsed sports nerd.

The absence of the Opals controversial playing strip will please promoters.

SANTANDER, Spain, July 31 (Reuters) - In just two pre-season matches Spanish first division club Racing Santander have managed to score an incredible 59 goals.

Beautiful Spain...

His 'Rugby Tips' from last week not to his liking Canberran scrapper Brian 'BJ' Jones defends his tackling tactics and unearths a few conspiracy theories into the bargain.

Disturbing sentiments from a tortured soul...

The Skink Editor's taunting of Brian 'BJ' Jones has been criticised in many circles, with Jones's lack of teeth being a major bugbear for the feisty former halfback and dog-meat wholesaler.

California, Wednesday:Russian tennis genius Anna Kournikova silenced her critics and announced herself as a serious contender on the ATP Tour with an uncompromising demolition of 6th seed Nathalie Tauziate in the Quarter Finals of the Acura Classic in Carlsbad, California.

At the post-match press conference the Russian wunderkind removed an errant lock of hair from her eyes, giggled endearingly and said "How the hell about my arse!"

Not a bimbo! Anna has arrived after her comprehensive victory over American Lindsay Davenport. And my, what hips.

The Poms' sporting achievements are ever a source of wonder here at The Skink and occasional columnist Dario endeavours to find a sport they're good at without much luck...