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THE SKINK

Volume 1, Edition 15             -        Monday, 10th July 2000        -             www.theskink.com

Australia's Weekly Sports News Review

The Latvian Pantsman on the Home of Cricket....

A. No. Well, this photo is, a bit.

Issue of The Week

Q. Is the Skink's interest in Anna Kournikova sordid?

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1999 was an incredible year for Australian sport, and Skink Editor Matt Cleary tried to be at every stage of it. He was at Lords and Cardiff when our cricket and rugby world champs saluted the judges, as well as being pissed in an Irish-Cuban pub in Prague, when Steve Larkham's semi-final drop-kick shopped the Boks.


In this first report in a series of 1999 sports updates, he regales us with his visit to Worcester for the Aussie cricketers first World Cup match v Scotland…

In Brief:


Tennis: Andre Agassi's head has been targeted by Hollywood talent scouts as a prop for Alien Nation III.


Boxing: Anthony Mundine's opponent in last Monday's fight at the Sydney Entertainment Cenre, Kiwi Gerrard Zohs, was voted the skinniest fat person ever to enter a boxing ring by boxing magazine About Boxing.


Sydney, Tuesday: Knowing even the best efforts of venerable rugby coach Bob Dwyer won't help them for shit in the AAMI Super 12 Series the NSW Waratahs have enlisted the help of God in order to compete in the world's premier provincial rugby competition.


God Says No...


Stats Watch

(Thanks to Dymocks Books)

Number of people who've bought Werner Reiterer's book 'Positive' because it contains drug-taking references.

Number of people who've bought Werner Reiterer's book 'Positive' because it contains humourous discus hurling anecdotes.

BUENOS AIRES, July 4 (Reuters) - An Argentine primary school teacher is under investigation for

MADRID, July 5 (Reuters) - Police investigating a burglary in southeast Spain came up with more

BRASILIA, July 5 (Reuters) - Security guards watching over Brazil's president have

ST. LOUIS, July 6 (Reuters) - A jury has awarded more than $24 million to a former hockey

18,488

6

Guest Columnists

Our man The Rabbit Trapper did have a lovely poem on the media frenzy surrounding Skink covergirl Anna Kournikova, but one of our work experience kiddies deleted it. Sorry Rab, re-send for next week please champion.

Mick Crossman's first 15 minutes of Skinkfamy has resulted in an interesting exposé on kiddies Saturday morning video shows that features nothing the fuck to do with sport but has the important bullshitting element covered...

It's not often a Guest Columnist earns star billing here at The Skink, but the very interesting Y.I.Orta is back and has uncovered every newsworthy scoop on the week's sporting agenda, and not a few besides...

Woodforde and Woodbridge unable to earn bloke status

England, Saturday: Despite their record 6th Wimbledon Doubles crown, the Woodies--aka Mark Woodforde and Todd Woodbridge--are unable to shake the general perception throughout Australia that they are a pair of poindexter sports nerd nob gobblers.

Doubles tennis...the poor, white trash, illiterate, retarded, bastard, idiot, fuckwit cousin of singles tennis. And these fellows rule it's world. Sorry Woodies, but we at The Skink are more underwhelmed than John Holmes in a pocket vagina factory.

Greg Matthews would have his work cut out on the Agassi bubble cranium, yeah yeah.

Nostalgia Zone: The Skink Editor, The Guinness Tent, Rugby World Cup Final, Cardiff, Nov 6, 1999.

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